.Publisher's Details: The following is the text message of a letter coming from Expedition 3 Leader Frank L. Culbertson (Leader, USN Retired), reflecting on the celebrations of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I haven't composed significantly about specifics of this particular mission during the course of the month I've been actually below, primarily for two reasons: the very first being actually that there has actually been actually really little bit of opportunity to carry out that kind of writing, as well as secondly considering that I am actually uncertain how comfy I am discussing notions I share with friends and family with the remainder of the globe.Properly, clearly the world altered today. What I mention or perform is quite minor matched up to the implication of what took place to our nation today when it was actually attacked through ... through whom? Terrorists is all we understand, I suppose. Difficult to understand at whom to point our anger and fear ...I had actually merely finished a lot of duties today, one of the most time-consuming being actually the physical exams of all crew participants. In a personal discussion observing that, the trip surgeon informed me they were possessing an incredibly poor time on the ground. I possessed no suggestion ...He explained the circumstance to me as absolute best he knew it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was actually thrown for a loop, then terrified. My first thought was actually that this had not been a real conversation, that I was actually still listening to among my Tom Clancy tapes. It simply didn't appear feasible on this scale in our nation. I could not even envision the details, also before the information of additional destruction started coming in.Vladimir came by pretty promptly, sensing that one thing quite major was actually being covered. I swung Michael right into the module as well. They were also amazed as well as stunned. After our experts signed off, I made an effort to reveal to Vladimir and Michael as absolute best I might the prospective size of the show of fear in midtown Manhattan and at the Government. They clearly knew as well as were actually really understanding.I browsed the World Chart on the computer system to find where over the world our team were and observed that our company were actually coming southeast out of Canada and would be actually overlooking New England in a couple of moments. I zipped around the station till I discovered a home window that would give me a view of New York City and got hold of the nearest cam. It happened to be a video camera, and I was appearing southern coming from the home window of Michael's cabin.The smoke cigarettes seemed to possess a weird blossom to it at the base of the pillar that was actually streaming south of the area. After going through among the newspaper article we just acquired, I think our experts were actually examining NY around the time of, or even shortly after, the failure of the 2nd high rise. Just how horrendous ...I scanned the electronic camera the whole time the East Coastline to the south to find if I could find every other smoke cigarettes around Washington, or anywhere else, but nothing at all showed up.It was pretty tough to deal with job after that, though our experts possessed some to carry out, however on the upcoming track our experts went across the US additional south. All 3 people were actually working a couple of cams to make an effort to obtain sights of New york city or Washington. There was fog over Washington, yet no particular resource could be found. It all looked unbelievable coming from 2 to 3 hundred miles away. I can not visualize the tragic scenes on the ground.Besides the emotional effect of our country being actually dealt with as well as thousands of our citizens and perhaps some friends being killed, one of the most frustrating feeling being where I am actually is one of isolation.Upcoming day ... I presume the exhaustion and psychological pressure received the best of me. I couldn't stay awake and continue to create. Today was still hard, however we started getting additional information, plus our experts had the tribute of speaking straight with the Facility Supervisor, Roy Estess, who ensured our team that the ground crews would remain to operate as well as ensure our safety and security, along with the safe function of the Place. Our company likewise talked to our Administrator, Mr. Goldin, that included that the companions in the Plan are all entirely devoted to proceeding safe operations as well as support. These were certainly never inquiries for me. I understand all these folks! The ground teams have been exceptionally supportive, quite understanding of the influence of the headlines, and have made an effort to be as beneficial as achievable. They have actually all been extremely professional and concentrated though I can't imagine the interruption of this particular type of information being available in as well as the notion that authorities structures might be at risk. They never ever avoided a beat, even when moving nerve center. As well as a team of elderly personnel and also buddies gave us a fairly detailed briefing about what was actually understood and what was being carried out in the federal government and at NASA on Tuesday mid-day, which was actually quite beneficial as well as kind of them to perform in the middle of all the distress. The Russian TsUP has likewise been helpful and valuable, making an effort to uplink newspaper article when our personal resources were unusable, and claiming kind terms ...My crewmates have actually been excellent, as well. They know it's been a tough day for me as well as the individuals on the ground, as well as they've attempted to become as also keeled as well as helpful as achievable. Michael even repaired me my favorite Borscht soup for dinner. And they provide me lots of room to assume when I needed it. They are actually incredibly understanding and naturally outraged at whoever will perform this.I understand a lot of individuals in Washington, plenty of people that take a trip to DC and New York City, so many who are captains, that I really felt sure I would receive at least a couple of items of bad news over the following couple of times. I obtained the initial one today when I discovered that the Leader of the American Airlines jet that hit the Pentagon was actually Chic Burlingame, a schoolmate of mine. I came across Chic in the course of plebe summer months when our company resided in the D&B all together, and our experts possessed considerable amounts of lessons together. I can't envision what he must of looked at, as well as now I hear that he might have increased additionally than our company can even think of through perhaps preventing his airplane from being the one to tackle the White Property. What a dreadful reduction, yet I'm sure Chic was fighting bravely throughout. As well as splits do not flow the exact same in space ...It's challenging to illustrate how it really feels to be the only United States entirely off the world each time such as this. The sensation that I ought to exist with all of you, handling this, aiding somehow, is overwhelming. I recognize that our team perform the limit (or beyond) of a dreadful switch in the history of the world. Many points will certainly never ever coincide once again after September 11, 2001. Certainly not only for the 1000s and also 1000s of people directly impacted through these hideous process of terrorism, but perhaps for we all. Our company are going to locate ourselves really feeling in different ways concerning loads of traits, featuring possibly area exploration, unfortunately.It is actually horrendous to find smoke pouring from cuts in your own country from such a wonderful vantage point. The duality of performing a space probe devoted to enhancing everyday life on the planet and also checking out life being destroyed through such intentional, dreadful actions is jolting to the subconscious, despite who you are actually. And the understanding that whatever will definitely be actually different than when our experts released by the time our team land is a little disconcerting. I believe in our nation and also in our leadership that we are going to do every thing achievable to much better protect her as well as our families, and to bring fair treatment wherefore has been carried out. I have peace of mind that the great people at NASA will definitely perform every thing important to proceed our objective carefully as well as return us securely at the right time. And also I miss out on each of you quite. I can't exist along with you in person, as well as our company possess a long way to head to complete our mission, but be actually particular that my center is actually along with you, and understand you are in my petitions.Submissively, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An improve to the final letter ... Luckily, it's been actually an active full week up right here. And also to verify that, like our nation, our team are actually continuing on our intended course with service as usual (as long as achievable). Tonight the current add-on to the place, the Russian Docking Area will definitely be launched from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Sunday night (United States time), it will definitely dock with our team, at a slot never utilized before on the nadir side of the Company Component. This brand new module will definitely provide our team one more place to dock a Development or Soyuz and also will deliver a big airlock along with pair of useable hatches for conducting EVA's in Russian Orlan fits, which our experts are going to do a few of prior to our company get back.The trouble prior to in handling today was actually inadequate news. The concern right now is actually excessive. It arrived simultaneously when e-mail was recovered, and there's insufficient time to read everything! Plus it is actually also hard to deal with all of it instantly. However I cherish acquiring it, and I really appreciate the excellent characters of help and also friendship I am acquiring.Our team are actually doing well on board, getting our job done, and speaking about traits. Last night our company had a long dialogue over dinner about the significance of these activities, the achievable actions to follow, as well as what must be performed. After supper, Michael challenged telling me that every email he obtained coming from friends in Russia stated specifically to inform me exactly how regretful they were that this occurred, extending their acknowledgements, as well as asking exactly how I was actually performing. Vladimir instructed me the Russian phrase for "condolences" after speaking with the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Superstar Urban area. (Both the Russian and also the English terms are a lot too lengthy to verbalize easily.) Extremely kind people.For the last two times, the Russian MCC has actually sufficed to send real-time programs of broadcast headlines about the occasion as well as associated stories, to be sure I was well updated. Every professional that has actually come on free throw line to talk about a method or even a problem has at some point prolonged introductions to me with kind words. Tonight the Russian capcom told our company that because of the wedding of remembrance in the US, all day individuals had actually been actually carrying flowers and also lining all the wall structures of the United States embassy in Moscow, as well as this evening they were actually igniting candle lights in the road outside the consular office. How the planet has altered.Folks all over seem to acknowledge the senselessness and also terror within this strike. As well as the incredible reduction. Moscow has taken care of these kind of troubles in the last few years along with house as well as metro battles, so they are actually as nervous to get rid of this threat as our company are. Yet the bottom line is that there are actually excellent individuals all over who would like to live in tranquility. I check out that a youngster talked to, "The United States is actually thus good to various other nations, we regularly help everybody, just how can they hate our company a lot?".I really hope the example of teamwork and also rely on that this space probe plus all the people in the program demonstrate daily are going to someday inspire the remainder of the world to function the same way. They must!However, we won't be actually taking flight over the United States while people are actually lighting candles. Do not understand if our experts could view that anyhow. Our team did, however, observe an extremely uncommon and also wonderful view a couple of moments ago: the launch of our Docking Compartment on a Soyuz booster. Our company were surpassing it and also it appeared concerning three minutes after its own launch from Baikonur as the sunlight struck our terminal, so it was actually still in the dark. It appeared like a big comet with a directly, large tail silhouetted against the black earth below. Despite some bad lighting for some time as the sunshine hit our home window at a reduced perspective, I handled some video recording of it as to begin with our experts passed the spacecraft, and then saw it start to catch up as it obtained elevation and also speed. I shot until primary motor cutoff and booster splitting up happened equally as our team approached sunrise on the Himalayas. A remarkable view in a remarkable full week ...Life takes place, also in space. Our experts're below to stay ... Frank.